Thursday, August 23, 2012

The spark!

*I'm really discussing some personal things today. I had no idea I would do this today but just started typing. I'm sure it is a God thing and someone else needs to read this today.

Last night at the dinner table my husband was doing or saying something that he thought was funny. I rolled my eyes and asked him if that was the kind of talk he used on our first date. I remember thinking he was so funny. I asked him if his sense of humor changed or mine.

Things have been tense lately. I almost hesitate to write tense. Less than tense really. We have a great marriage and friendship...

I stopped writing here because I knew if I kept writing everyone would just tell us to go on a date. Yes, we do need to go on a date. But I don't think having someone watch Chase and going on a date is the only solution. There has to be a way to get that spark back when a babysitter isn't available. Then God whispered that I should look at things I've pinned on pinterest in regards to dates at home.

The first post I read was this.

The second post I read was 25 ways to communicate respect. 1. Choose joy is something I definitely need to do. Some days it feels like I've been in a bad mood since Chase was born. 2. Honor his wishes is another one I need to do! I struggle with doing things around the house because Hubby likes them done or because I like them done. It is difficult to be the one that is home a lot more than your other half. The division of labor is a struggle in a lot of marriages I think. Seeing someone else give the advice to honor my husband's wishes makes it not seem like such a bad thing.

Are you still with me? Do you agree with these posts? I know so many people give Alexis on the Real Housewives of Orange County a hard time for not traveling without her husband, but I relate to her. I spend a lot of time with my husband. We rarely are apart.

I'm so excited for Hubby to get home today so I can start communicating respect!


  1. Thanks for being honest!
    Marriage is something that CONSTANTLY has to be worked on no matter how long you've been together or how close a couple is. Sometimes we need reminders like this to show us that we can't always assume everything is going to be fine.

  2. I'm a BIG believer in knowing your spouse's Love Language. That really does help to know and Dylan and I know each others but it does take some work to meet that person's love language. Dylan and I both agree that our marriage is going to need some work when he comes home. We're in a great place BUT with him being gone for 6 months, he's changing, I'm changing, and factoring in the lack of communication makes marriage difficult. I could write a TON on this but I think reading links like that helps you realize what you should work on in your own marriage! Your marriage deserves the best!

  3. Respect and communication are absolutely two keys to a successful marriage. Not just talking to each other, but hearing, listening, and understanding each other. My husband and I rarely go out alone--once in the last nearly five years! However, each night we make time after the kids are in bed to spend at least an hour, often more, talking about everything but the kids. I hope your efforts are successful! I'm following from the blog hop and would love for you to stop by my page and follow back :). Have a great weekend.

  4. Couldn't agree more.
    Respect and communication are such big parts and in a very small place I kinda understand where Alexis comes from on that point. Do I think he husband is a jerk sometimes, yes....but atleast their both on the same page with their marriage.

  5. Loved this post! Thanks for sharing your heart. Marriage takes work, especially after you have kids!!! We celebrate 10 years tomorrow (Crazy!!!) We have gone through ebs and flows over the years, but the thing that makes us stronger is communication & respect. Those are HUGE. We are actually re-reading 5 love languages because I think ours have changed in 10 years & adding 3 kids to the mix!

  6. This is a great post, thank you for being so open and honest. Marriage is not easy and it takes work...especially lots of communication and mutual respect.