Mini Calendars!! (warning post may be offensive)

At lunch last week Hubby was telling me how his mini calendar he got from a vendor at work has phone numbers for airlines and hotels. I told him he should put it in his purse. He didn't even laugh! It was a slow day at work and he was putting important dates in his calendar. So later on that day I decided to look at my tiny calendar given to me by some other company. I told him mine had maps and cpr instructions so his little calendar could take that! He said his did too. :( Then this converstion happened:
Meagan:
mine has quotes every week
Hubby:
HUH?
Me:
oh no tidbits of wisdom in your calendar?
Me:
mine even has one from paula abdul!!
Hubby:
NO WAY
Me:
admit it my tiny calendar is better than yours
Me:
and garth brooks
Hubby:
he is a homo (I apologize for Hubby. He isn't anti gay or anything just uses unpolitically correct words)
Me:
um what did you just say?
Me:
he is married to Miss Trisha Yearwood
Hubby:
homet
Me:
what is a homet?
Hubby:
a girl homo
Me:
did you just make that up?
Hubby:
its a real word
Me:
lots of unknown comments
Me:
homet- no dictionary results (copy and pasted this from dictionary.com)
No results found for homet:
Did you mean hemet?

I just think that is hilarious. Homet. Classic.

I was looking through the book some more realizing we don't have much going on this year when I stumbled across this gem, "You should live your own life up to your own expectations." -Tiger Woods. I guess he has low expectations!

Dear Tiger

My dad bought tickets to the US Open because he wanted to see you play. I have not made a peep on this blog about your accident and all the hooplah after. I do not care how many woman you slept with. I am now concerned because you have taken a break from golf. So you have managed to piss off everyone that cared about you. You have 7 months to get your stuff together and back out on the grass or I will be sending this letter to you. My dad has been a fan of yours for probaly 10 years now. He used to have a picture of you on our TV. He loves saying your name. I understand you have a lot going on right now, but like I said you have a few months to figure it out before I start calling.

Thanks,

Your number 1 fan's daughter